Twenty-one, Single, & Exactly How I Want It To Be

During a recent dinner time conversation with my mom, we discussed dating, relationships, and friends of mine in serious relationships.

We then continued to discuss people I went to high school with that are engaged, married, or are having/have kids.

I’m not even close to any of these. Oh no, no, no. In the future – but not too near- I do plan on getting engaged, having my Cinderella themed wedding, and having kids.

But for now, I’m single- which is exactly what I want to be.

For right now, at 21 years old, I am choosing to be single. I am living my life by my rules, while I can. Life is what you make it- which  is why I want my college years to be exactly how I want them to be.

I have so many opportunities presented to me at all times of the day. With these opportunities, I want to take them on with my own rules and my own perspective. If I want to go out to a club on a Saturday night, I’m going to. If I want to have a girls night, I will. I don’t have anyone else’s schedule to plan mine around. I don’t want to have to think before doing. I want to just live my life and live out my actions for me.

Right now, I am having the time of my life with my best friends – people who I know will be by my side in the future.

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I am more focused on finding the women who will be standing next to me as my bridesmaids than I am the man standing next to me at the alter. I don’t want my kids to ask me about college and start my stories around “some boy” that no longer matters. I want them to be revolving around my friends, who they know and whose own kids mine will be friends with them.

I’m out, meeting new people. If you want to wine and dine me, I won’t say no. But at the end of the night, I am eating Dominos with my friends, talking about the night, then getting into our pajamas for a sleepover.

More importantly, I am learning how to be strong and independent. I can take care of myself. I can fix my own things when they break.  I am working hard in all aspects of my life so I can succeed. I don’t need to depend on a man in my future. I am a strong woman who will not take a back seat to a man.

If it wasn’t for discovering myself and all that I accomplish now, by being single, I may never have had to figure it out.

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This isn’t my pledge of swearing off boys – some of my very best friends are of the male gender, my future groomsmen.

This is my pledge as to why I’m putting more time and effort into me and my life. I’m young and I’m doing what’s best for me.

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3 thoughts on “Twenty-one, Single, & Exactly How I Want It To Be

  1. I am exactly the same way, and in the same place. I think I”m at that part of my life where I need to focus on getting my own stuff together, and figuring out what I want, before I can worry about someone else. And I definitely agree with finding the women who will be my bridesmaids before the man at the altar… I have made some amazing friends in college.

  2. Pingback: An Open Letter to my Little as She Becomes a Grand-Big | Sparkle and Shine

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